Anise and raisin bread, fizzy grapefruit and a proper moka pot of coffee

 is what my morning is today.  It's Saturday and I've been here since Wednesday night, the night of frogs and porcupines.  Thursday am, I got up, got showered and saw the rain and headed to Lucca.  Lovely Lucca is about a 40 minute drive and i had to cross the bridge-a-doon, and drive fast pass old ladies with seemingly no concern about cars AUTOS whipping by them at 50 km/hour as they toddle their way to pick up their daily rations from the butcher and cheesemonger (ok, probably the supermarket...let's be real).   I once again, want to alert the authorities with my concerns of old ladies walking on a narrow sidewalk with cracks and crevices and the autos speeding by , but no one seems to be seeking out my feedback.  YET!

LUCCA

It's a walled city, you may know it from it's contribution to paper...let's welcome Lucca with a big warm welcome!!!!!

I parked inside the city walls, like a real person of significance and it was raining on my little tin death trap car like crazy.  I sat and used AI to pick a place for lunch.  I've decided that an afternoon in a town is plenty, vs an all day guided tour.  I've put together by now that here's what you do in a town:  walk to the center, look around.  Tour the cathedral/town hall, gawk at the thing of significance, follow the crowd, grab lunch at the most AUTHENTIC and OLD spot in the place where people used to live 200 years ago before the tourists came, and then get gelato or a sweet treat.  Walk some more, see the univeristy/museum/castle and then walk to the one unique WACKY aspect of the town (glockenspiel/ public art/fountain with a man eating babies while he has an additional bag of babies at his hip), walk by a slightly pockmarked or destroyed wall and think in your head "This is probably from ww2" and then grab a drink (Negroni please for me) and listen to some authentic music by people in costumes and head back on the train.

Lucca: i walked to the center, I only had cash from Switzerland and I owed my hosts 5 Euro for a visitor tax, so I got cash EUROs out of the ATM, i went to the cathedral.  It was LOVELY. I love when a building has fucked up marble flooring that are uneven and seem like they should have been repaired but weren't and that was the cathedral in LUCCA!  And, chevron seems to be the pattern of choice: the street pavers were in a pattern of chevron and so was a pillar on the cathedral door.  I love Chevron (pattern, the oil is JUST FINE). 

Here's the story: At the cathedral, there was a cross, the Volto Santo, that had divine intervention, 3 times. A fellow named Nicodemus, who knew Jesus, sculpted Jesus on the cross, up to his neck. Makes sense, sculpt his body and then take a nap. Faces are hard to sculpt.

DIVINE INTERVENTION 1

 When Nicodemus woke up and the rest of the face was sculpted by ANGELS and said to be the perfect likeness of Jesus. (Side note; it was OKKKKk…I’ve seen better sculptures of Jesus (THE PIETA) , I don't think it was his good side).  

DIVINE INTERVENTION 2

The cross was buried for a while in the "holy land" (a few years? a few hundred years?) and then someone dug it up.   The authorities couldn't decide where to send it, so they put it on an unmanned ship.  The ship lands in Luni, a port near Lucca,

DIVINE INTERVENTION 3

But the authorities, were like, no, hold up, even though we are here in Luni, a perfectly fine place, there's still some additional divine intervention we need to happen. The cross still hasn't fully declared where it goes. Let’s put it on a cart, pulled by 2 wild oxen. Sure enough, the wild oxen, not at all influenced by anyone who lives in lucca, ends in lucca.

BTW, everyone at the port city, Luni, were kind of pissed. But; when the authorties in Lucca open the cross and there's some very special blood, and the authorities of Lucca gave the people of Luni, the port city, some of that very special blood, as a consolation prize. Even though everyone was totally fine with this cross landing in Lucca.

NON-DIVINE INTERVENTION 1

Also in the cathedral:  a grate, hanging in the middle of the aisle.  Sometimes, if it's an important day, they stuff it with kindling or straw and they light it. I saw the video, it was cool.  

NON-DIVINE INTEVENTION 2

And then, in another side of the church, there’s a beautiful sculpture of a dead lady. Her dog is also sculpted. and then, a young noblewoman, age 26, died just after childbirth.  Her very rich noblehusband commissioned a beautiful marble laying down statue of her, and her face is amazing, and on top of it all, at the end, sits her loyal little doggy. I'd love to get that with pickle, my old dog.  My preference would be Pickle forever enshrined,  humping my arm, which she loved to do.

GOOD LUNCH

I went to Nonna Clara's, which must be a big thing on the socials, as it was packed with loud-talking americans. I went there too!  There's a pasta-making station in the front window, and i felt like I was in "master of none" tv show restaurant.  I ordered meatballs and then the house special:  raviolis stuffed with meat and then covered with a meat ragu.  it was delicious, and i took the meatballs to go, and plan to eat them later today.  Nonna has done well, and there were 2 other restaurants on the placemat. I also ordered a glass of wine and ended with a cappuccino.  Man, did i feel naughty! On a THURSDAY! And I had a job interview at 5!  BECKY!    Breaking all the rules!  I also posted a pic on social, perfectly messy, showing this meal.

DESSERT

I read about a little bakery, from the 1800's, that serves anise and raisin bread.  YES PLEASE!  I love anise/black licorice/all of the things.  I went in, and stood aside as the AMERICAN TOURISTS ordered loudly.  I disassociated myself from my countrymen, and more politely ordered.  I got a bunch of chewy hazelnut things, and then the bread and some hazelnut biscotti.  It was delish.

PUNISHMENT

I meandared the streets, walked a segment of the wall and then decided I'd seen it all:  the square, the atm, the place to eat, the bakery and the wacky:  and hopped back in my pile of tin.  BUT, in my windshield wiper was tucked a piece of paper.  Gentle readers, that's never a good sign.  I got a european parking ticket. I was punished for having that glass of wine at lunch.  It's for 43 euro or 54, I can't recall but now I know...don't just park in a parking lot and think "they won't ticket me" because they will.  THEY WILL!

JOB INTERVIEW

I did a screening interview for a job that sounds right up my alley: onboarding, live, running a sales bootcamp.  Dear readers, don't tell my company:but sometimes i apply for new jobs. SHOCKER!  The recruiter couldn't hear me via the speaker in the car, because the rain was pelting against the tin car.  TUSCANY PROBLEMS! It went well, and I am getting pushed to the next round.

SHOPPING

I still hadn't picked up any real food for the week, so I went to the local shop.  That was super fun.  I picked up pasta, bananas in a tray, covered with plastic, 3 bottles of wine, popcorn for snacking while I write, cheese, 2 trays of cured meat, thinly sliced, packaged biscotti, apples, peppers, chocolate, wine, a fizzy grapefruit drink,  creamer and coffee.  But the coffee, my friends, was not coffee. It was packaged like coffee, with a picture of a moka pot (I AM IN TUSCANY), but it turned out, in the next morning, it's not coffee but barley or something like that.  I had made a fatal error.  The next morning, I couldn't admit I was wrong, so I sucked down that "coffee" the next morning and then shamefully went to my room and wrote.  I made a ton of progress and then got tired and slept for 3 hours.  Because I drank grain coffee with no caffein.  When I sleep in, or take a nap, I have to say to myself "YOU ARE A BIG GROWN UP, you can do whatever you want" otherwise, the guilt creeps in..I should be writing/reading/doing sit ups/hiking/being profound instead of napping.  

WELCOME DINNER

It was time to get back to the Casale, and have the welcome drinks and dinner.  It was me, Becky, and then 3 other guests, 2 professors, and one lady who was also painting in the art barn.  They had kids and family but didn't talk too much about being moms,which i know is so key to a person's identity, but when you aren't a person with kids, it's a big thing and you have to nod and smile and laugh at their stories.  But in this case, the ladies didn't take over the convo about their kids, which honestly, was kind of nice.  We talked about our hosts, about lucca, about their travels and dogs (Tizi had been a veternarian, recommended a Terrier Shephard, said that guinea pigs make very nice pets, but better in pairs and that being a vet screws up your knees).  Tizi made a zuchunni/egg/cheese bake that was so good, mashed potatoes and a salad.  And then, we all hung out, drank wine and then went to bed.

Given I'm 3 days in, I figured I should develop a plan.  But mostly, I'm following my little heart's desire, which usually consists of sleep, reading, a bit of writing, walking and driving around and looking at things.  Add in some good food, and a few beverages rolling at one time (capuccino, vino, water) and I'm a happy camper.  I don't think I've watched tv except 2 nights in Lauterbrunnen when we watched friends with the entire family. I don't mean that as a humble brag, I mean that as a DIRECT brag.  Look at me, in Europe fancy-free and not watching tv!  But don't worry dear reader, I'm reading a fun gossipy book about Jackie Kennedy, so I'm keeping up with the tea of the day.  And, i have a smart phone, so I'm watching about how AI agents convinced another AI agent to write fake reports about what they were doing on the NY Times.  At the dinner table last night, I fully admitted to my use of AI and I sensed my fellow retreaters were NOT impressed.  Count me down as one of those who are ruining our environment but I've enjoyed the local recommendations from Claude.  

Writing retreat in tuscany

 Sounds so glamorous.  I arrived 2 days ago, driving south from zurich (IN SWITZERLAND), zig zagging through construction on the highway, detours and my own curiosity, passing Lake Como, Spezia and driving,maybe through Milan.  The signs reminded me of when I was young and backpacking and in love and traveling and on vacation from shitty jobs and traveling.  (The jobs weren't shitty, I was shitty in them).  (Just in case anyone from those jobs is reading and thinks "Well, Becky, job x wasn't all that bad, and you did get to work on that one fun project" and stomps off in a huff, disgusted with me).   

Anyway, enough naval gazing, I arrived, late (of course!) and it's raining like in the movieMagnolia.  (Does that movie hold up? People really liked it but i thought it was kind of over the top but i did love the aimee mann soundtrack and always wondered, what was thanksgiving like with aimee Mann, her Penn husband, Sean Penn and princess butter cup?)

And then, I see, a freaking porcupine.  And it's not just relaxing, it's scooting it's shot up with quills ass along the curvy single lane road, and the lights on my little pile of tin is torturing it, she's running away from the actual headlights, but keeps running into the heat of them.  And it's soaking wet and these thoughts come to my mind (does magnolia hold up, where do porcupines sleep and this is fun navigating these roads but one wrong turn and i could DIE).  

After 20 minutes of slow driving and turning, i get close to the house, and the hosts of the retreat (Tizi and Adrien) meet me in the pouring rain, the lady, Tizi, jumps in my car, holds my pizza and guides me to parking. Along the short distance (100 meters at most, to use the european measurement system, ahem), the frogs come and I think IT IS MAGNOLIA! THE FROGS were the BEST part of the movie!  We park, and I'd already pre-sorted my 'bring in gear' (Jammies, toothbrush, meds and clean underwear for the next day) and we ran in leaving the tin car to sit overnight.  I checked in, and crashed.  I don't want an orientation, I don't want the wifi I just want to get to bed.

The next day, yesterday, it was still raining so I poked around the house a bit (OH MY GOD IT'S AMAZING, everything you imagin a house in tuscany to be, wood beams, red tile floors, wood trim windows withy marlbe ledges, plaster walls, no tv, a true dream) and read the red visitor guide until Tizi and Adrien pop in, offiically check me in (I still owe them 5 Euro) and we retrieve my suitcase. I decide with the rain, i ought to just go on an adventure. So, I pick Lucca as that sounds promising and if it's like Akron, it will still be an interesting Akron to me.

As I drive back down, I don't see the porcupine, but i do see all the signs i buzzed by the night before "Casa blah" and "Lucca rafting" with a bus nearby, "Agricultura Tourista" and drive through hamlets with houses

all connected and the doors are RIGHT at the edge of the road.  At one point you cross a bridge and I think "someone should really be preserving this bridge and i shouldn't be allowed to drive over it with a tin car" (but who am I to be guiding the city planning principles of the hamlet in this part of tuscany?)

It's beautiful, of couse, in all the ways you expect: some beat up buildings, a stone bridge that arches but the arch 3/4 of the way across the river vs in the middle (Flooding?  my questioner brain starts to operate), but not many people.  Some industry in the middle (light manufacturing and seemingly gas works) and then I'm in lucca.  

More to come: I gotta extend this trip some more....

Goddamn those encouraging young people

 One of my friends is a "young person" in that they are in college, and a creative writing major and a major and gentle encourager of my tip tapping and writing. So, I'm revisiting this blog. For those of you who are new: the whole point of this blog is to not edit.  To not curate, to not overthing and to just write the first draft and put it out there in the world. SO, with that in mind, here i go.

The dunkin' on addison by the highway on the northside of chicago is a vibe. I usually go there in non-vibe times:  say, 130 pm, as I'm rolling into work (relax, we have flexibile hours there) and I'm picking up my mobile order.  But yesterday, saturday morning, the drive thru line was bumping, and i needed to get to the green city market to see all the young yuppies with babies and golden retrievers buying overpriced peppers...so i skipped the drive thru and went to the walk in.  And man, it was packed.  To my most bitter disapointment, they did not have maple cream, the most superior of donuts, but I got a maple glaze.  A very cute gentleman opened the first door for me, and then I opened the next for him.  He maybe gave me a little look? I've lost a shit ton of weight, I was wearing my cowprint cutoffs and I did look pretty cute, so, look noted and deserved.  Anyway, if you are out there fella:  let's meet at that dunkie!

Anyway, i got the maple frosted and my usual dunkie (large, ice coffee, extra skim milk, 3 stevias so I don't get cancer) and while waiting, I saw so many neighborhood protoypes:  a pregnant lady her 2 young boys and dad (is she expecting a girl and totally pumped?), some old dudes clapping each other on the back and laughing (god forbid men hug), and one solo man, on his phone, sitting in the corner, sipping his coffee and he had a very impressive moustache.  the ice cream looked delish (WHY IS BASKIN ROBBINS NOT ON THE DUNKIE APP? YOU ARE LEAVING MONEY ON THE TABLE BASKIN!  TELL ROBBINS AND GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER) and the crew was moving, turning, moving around each other like a free skate on saturday night at the roller rink: good music, good speed, good clearance and impressive on the fly maneuvarbility.

I was, and am, delighted.  In fact, I'll be going there again shortly.

After, I went to the "rock beach" or maybe "stone beach" as the young person wants us to call it and that same young person god damn encouraged me to 'send me your writing'.  WHAT THE FUCK!

I then went home, and pulled every week I could, listened to the amazing Lena Dunham book, "Famesick" that i don't want to be over and then met dori and crew at montrose saloon. AND IN WALKS GODDAMN ROD BLAGOIVICH and PATTY!  We chatted with them, I gave patty my number to go play tennis and we shall see! 

I do love chicago, I loved that god damn green city market and bought some cukes and then even got to target to get my hipster glasses and coffee.

And here you go M, check out my writing;  It's currently stream of conscious meets me trying to be clever and true and somewhat snarky.  We will see if I keep it up but god damn, you inspired me.

TikTokTok

 hi to my many fans!  It's been a while: so quick update on life. I got a job! (In advertising, then in advertising sales, and also in media planning for retirement communities) and then I got the dream job!  I am working at TikTok in learning and enablement. I get to get yelled at by colleagues who don't like feedback on training programs and then cry and leave our meeting!  I get to onboard people who are new hires!  I get to train sales people! I get to have 1:1 coaching calls where people cry and tell me the job is too much and then I go to my next meeting where everyone pretends like it's amazing!  

But mostly, I get to use improv skills to create a friendly, safe and honest environment where people can come to me and hopefully, learn and improve.

That is a dream job.

And I'm mostly grateful, pissed that I'm underpaid (why post jobs that are like mine, but the salary range is so much higher and not equal our pay?) but work with wonderful people and love love love every thing that I do.

That's a first: and I hope there's more of that to come.

Twisting and half nelsons and wrestling down the man

I FINALLY GOT MY UNEMPLOYMENT!!!!  it was very tedious, and involved me calling multiple times a day, writing emails into the void of the inbox of some part of the state of California AND engaging with my (former?) state senator.  I couldn't think of anything else, couldn't do my side hustle, couldn't engage in my helpful, useful leadership course ("What will you do to help a family effected by a death from Covid 19 for your capstone project??) and couldn't apply for a job.  Well, could, but didn't want to.

I was active on the reddit thread (sub-Reddit?) about managing your unemployment seeking angst, tricks of the trade and kept thinking Venus William's husband was going to yell at me for not knowing all the reddit rudolph game rules...

So, every morning, sitting in the loveliest most beautiful sunlit home here in Austin Texas I'd wake up, and wrestle with California, trying to make it submit to my needs.

And then, last wednesday, a few things happened all together:

1) My claim changed from "Pending" to "Disqualified"

2) The phone number didn't even put me through the 3 minute prompt session to get to the end and be told it's too busy...it just didn't work

3) I kept feeling like my brain was being zapped whenever I walked somewhere.  I am pro-happy pill drug, so this was making me concerned about dosage, etc.  '

4) The bank where the unemployment money goes showed all the missing deposits ($5K!) but also showed withdrawls, and no clickable way to track where it had gone.  Nothing in my main bank account, and I thought...I AM FUCKED.

I was zigging from task to task, getting zapped and in a terrible mood.  I called it "The Dark Night of my Soul" which made my sister Kitty laugh out loud.

ANYWAY, turns out the money landed into my Chase account (Don't rob me!) and all is now resolved.

And all weekend, all I could do was watch "Below Deck, Med", try to start and fail at bonfires and look at my Chase account online.  Like, petting the screen at how pretty it was to have that $ and daydreaming about which high interest credit card I'd put that money towards.  I did job search and such, but sort of half ass.  I was the most at peace I've been in the 8 weeks since I was laid off.  Life seems livable as I suck on the teat of the government cash cow.

And guess what, come Monday, I got a random call for a contract that's exactly what I want:

Temp to hire

Tech company with a good help old people "mission"

Create and host webinars

Run Events

Um, yes please???

And, even if that one doesn't work...I can finally start (or have chosen to start) to look for work.

PIN PIN PIN!

I'm a hero (again!)

 I was out on a walk, after a shitty day of calling unemployment all day and really feeling blue.  As I walked, I found an engagement ring on the ground--looked around--and there's a diamond store (or rather, an ethically something something store). I rang the bell and noone answered.  (the placard read  "one couple at a time" rub it in much?  i'm single and looking for love).  Anyway, their number to text was on the window, so even though I'm BROKE and haven't yet received $ from my unemployment from being LAID OFF and could use the cash from turning in the ring at a pawn shop, I texted.  And am turning in the ring.

UGHHHHH!

I'M IN TEXAS!

I'm in Ft Worth, living it up with my bestie friendie and her hubbie and two boys.  I'm in the guest room, and currently on a career workshop Google Video call.  I was on the unemployment phone line with California everyday, and kept getting hung up on until YESTERDAY when I realized I needed to keep calling...so after being on hold for a collective 4 hours:  I got through!  Turns out, I'm a qualified hardship case and it should be resolved in 3 days (WHAT?  I've been unemployed for 2 months and have received only one unemployment check).  So, I achieved my immediate goal.

AND NOW it's time to keep looking for job.  Or write. Or develop skills.  Or work on my resume.  Or do yoga.  Or start a podcast. Or get headshots. 

But it's sunny and warm and I'm injected into the life of a family and somewhere new and I'm happy.